Chronic Fatigue

Does it help to eat candy?

The revolting fact that the Swedes eat candy up to 16 kilos per person a year isn’t only disgusting but also true!

We eat more sugar than any country in the world. Still, we aren’t the fattest people on earth.

When I had a burnout I constantly looked for candy in our kitchen cabinets, hoping to find any candy crumbs or anything “candylike”, forgotten in our children’s room hidden under the beds, for them to take when they crave for it.
My cravings for sugar was limitless. I gain weight yes but not compared to the amount of candy I ate.

The thing is that candy was for me a way to prevent anxiety, or trying to prevent it. More true, to fool myself that candy would take that terrible feeling of anxiety away.
But it didn’t.
The same way, I believe it is with alcohol. You take it to forget, deaden your feeling of lack of worth, happiness or fulfilling feeling.
It doesn’t help, we know that don’t we?

And it doesn’t help to sleep, even if you sleep 10 hours a night, you won’t feel less tired.
Chronic fatigue comes with burnout. And that tiredness won’t go away for a while.

Chronic Fatigue:
In the early stages of burnout, you may find yourself lacking energy and feeling tired often. You may go to bed early but still, wake up tired. You may move more slowly and find you need extra time to get ready and get out the door. At its worse, the fatigue becomes a physical and psychological state of exhaustion. You feel drained. Everything takes a concerted effort. You have no energy, so you do as little as possible to make it through the day. You find it difficult to get out of bed and may even call in sick on the days you feel like you simply can’t get out of bed. This type of extreme fatigue also often results in a sense of dread for what lies ahead of you on any given day.

 

My own experience of this chronic fatigue goes back to the early days of my relationship with the man who became my abuser.

My way to my first burnout started when I was working on a project as a webmaster at a child health clinic in the hospital where I worked.
I was working nightshifts and at the same time, building a 20-page website with information to parents.

This was a ” do it yourself job”. I had no one to help me or work with so it was a hard task to follow through. I never asked for any help either. Maybe because I belong to that generation, or to prove to anyone that I can manage on my own.
I was a single mom, recently divorced, broken-hearted, alone and confused.

I made the mistake of opening up my heart to someone that wasn´t good for me.

My ability to have a clear sight was reduced. I felt small and useless. My previous marriage had told me so. Struggling to cope with the task of being alone with a poor economy. Not beautiful enough, not good enough.

When I was at the lowest point in my life, a man appeared that immediately started to court me and he absolutely kissed the ground I went on, but eventually struck me even deeper than I thought possible.

He knew what buttons to press to break me down. And I had no defense because he also gave me something I wanted and needed. Words of appreciation. He said I was beautiful and wonderful. But the next day the opposite.

He told me lies about myself that I eventually started to believe in. He told me that I was a whore, out at night. He told me that I had sex with a lot of men.

I tried to convince him that I didn’t but he hit me to make me “confess” that I did.


Totally broken by this person, I got pregnant. And I began to believe the lies about me.


The day I got my pregnancy test, he left.

Now I was a single mom, pregnant,  burned out…. and constantly exhausted….wow what a great combination!
My closest friends an relatives didn’t understand.
They didn’t know what I went through with this man. Some of them knew a little but not everything.

-Try to cheer up a bit. You have slept all night? How can you still be tired?

Friends and family who doesn´t understand, become a stone on the burden so you start to isolate yourself.  You just don’t have the energy to try to explain what’s happening inside. But when you meet someone who knows, you don’t need to.

It is now 13 years now since I got pregnant and my son is my dearest treasure.  So thankful for him.

Se ya!

 

2018 is a year of change

Is it possible to bounce back from a burnout?

I can with all my heart say that this is the year of change.  I realized that I need to stand up, take action, and not let this opportunity pass me by.  It’s more important than ever.

Don’t be scared off when I put that start in this blog, cause I’ve been in a black hole as well. So deep down depressed and anxious, without any beliefs of change and energy, to make away from that terrible state.

One moment you’re working to make everything good in your life, then before you know it, you’re flat on your back, unable to do anything more then perhaps open your eyes.

If you’ve ever been burnt out, then you know what I’m talking about

If you´re nearing a burnout maybe you think, this is not for me and you are ready to skip this blog, but I can assure you that if you stay you might even get an idea. An idea of how to change your life to prevent a burnout. You did google on the subject, didn’t you?

Burnout and stress
Burnout has become familiar

Burnout has become a familiar term

It’s common to hear people casually say, “Oh, I’m so burned out,” And you think, no you´re not. But they’re referring to a bad day or a bad week.  But for those who truly are burned out, it is much more than a bad day or a bad week.
It’s about one’s health, and overall quality of life, like happiness.

Why? Why me? Why do I feel the way I feel?
Unfortunately, few burnout victims see it coming until it’s too late. The good news is that it doesn’t have to get to that point. If you identify signs of burnout early, you can reverse the downward spiral.
Where are you?

Burnout is defined as a state of chronic stress and frustration that leads to:

  • Chronic fatigue- always tired even if you have a good night sleep. You feel drained
  • Insomnia:  You feel tired or even exhausted but have difficulties to fall asleep
  • Concentration and attention difficulties and forgetfulness
  • Physical symptoms for example chest and stomach pain
  • More vulnerable to illness: infections, colds etc
  • Loss of appetite or the opposite; you are trying to get away from the anxiety by eating
  • Anxiety, sometimes panic attacks
  • Depression
  • Anger
  • Loss of enjoyment
  • Isolation
    …..and so on…

In short, a burnout can take away life as you know it or once knew it. It can cause you to lose your job, your family, your friends, your sense of worth. So if you’re on that path, it’s important that you recognize it so you can do something about it.

Stay with me…

There is a way out and you have all the opportunity to turn it around if you feel that you are nearing it.
The thing is: You have to do a change and sometimes that change isn’t about taking a week off. Or slow down at your current work, or if you are a caregiver, which can be very rewarding and a privilege, it can also be very demanding and a change is necessary to cope. This downward spiral maybe doesn’t stop if you stay where you are. But don’t be discouraged.

I´m gonna tell you my story how I got up on my feet again and what I´m doing now.

To find your way back from burnout, when you expended all your energy,  takes time patience, and acceptance.
If you need to stay in bed playing Candy crush, it´s ok! Do it, and only that.
I did, but after a while I felt a little bit bored so I told myself ” It´s time for something new”, so I switched over to Instagram instead:)

At Instagram I found something that caught my mind, something that made me curious, and made me redirect my focus from anxiety to something totally different. I was, even if it was for only a couple of minutes the first time, focusing on something that made me curious, and kept my thoughts away from the fact that I didn’t´have the energy to take a shower that morning, or not enough energy to put the milk back into the fridge:)
Crazy but true, and I can laugh about it today:)

For me that was the key.  Refocusing one minute at the time.  And prayer. My faith in a living God is a big factor in my recovering.

So what do you focus on when you don’t have energy to focus on anything?

Think about what you did like before you got burned out.
I like miniatures! 🙂 Doll houses and stuff, babies, puppies, everything small.  I even think that egg pack for 4 eggs is cute:)

Have you heard of Origami owl? That’s what I saw on Instagram. Pictures of Origami Owl jewelry. Living lockets. Small miniatures in a glass locket.
That was the start of my journey back. Focusing on the jewelrys made me dream about a company of my own, with myself as a boss. Writing my own paycheck. Living my life without anybody pressing or stressing me out with their demands, without lack of time for rest.

After 6 months I have ordered my own jewelry line with lockets just like Origami owl, ready to launch. I totally messed up!:)
I knew I had to sell and I hated phone calls. Hated to make customer follow ups on the phone, so now I have a lot of jewelry in my home. Not selling anything.

Maybe you are in the phase of nearing a burnout. Or are you in the black hole right now?
Stay where you are, the sun is coming back. There is way. Deal with acceptance, have patience and take your time.

The biggest issue for me after I came back from the “black hole” was;
What can I work with now?  What kind of job do I want to have? What can I do for a living without get burned out again?

I have finally found a way for me to have energy for work

I found out that selling jewelry from a website on my own is going to take so much energy and time and I couldn’t afford that. I needed something easier. And I needed some education. I knew I could be a great student with a lot of potential. But I wanted to study on my own terms. I also wanted to earn while I learn. Does that even exist? Yes it does!

Lifestyle Business All My Delight
Work from home and get time freedom

The growing market in the world of business is ONLINE!
Growth in the digital economy is on a steep upward trend and there is no expectation of that ending. From social platforms to personal websites, e-commerce, youtube and blogging. It’s a booming economy that reaches billions of people.
The best is that this training where you earn while you learn is available to anyone online! Curious now?

I couldn’t resist this opportunity because my dream of a laptop lifestyle, where I can work from anywhere, anytime I want is, reachable to me now.
I´m on my way quitting my job, taking control of my own work situation, doing something I love. And I think I´m worth it:) I want to spend more time with my family. Want to travel and enjoy life! Until I started this journey I was working for my day off.
Now I work because I love working, with something I love.
You can do that to:)

See you soon!